Updates and Such

It's 4 AM on a Tuesday and I can't sleep. I should be working on assignments I have due coming up or on my book or even doing my FAFSA or ACA forms and sign-ups, but I have a terrible habit of self-sabotage. Which is probably why I haven't followed through on any of the goals I have set out for myself this year. Except for not failing out of grad school. That one is probably taking up most of my time and energy right now, and it has been my excuse for sucking at every other thing I'd like to do for myself this year (losing weight, writing a book, checking things off my bucket list).

I do have some new, good news though.

1. I have a large loan to pay for school and live on. This one is bittersweet because of just how large it is.

2. I'll be working ("studying") abroad this summer. I got accepted and the time approved off of work and I can't wait to be back in Europe. I'll be working in libraries in Stuttgart, Germany and Karlovy-Vary, Czech Republic. I'll be flying over there a few days early with my mom (to sightsee in Amsterdam and a little bit in Germany) and will be staying for a few days after the program to see Paris with my sister. I'm also hoping to see one of my old study abroad friends while I'm in Paris as well.

3. I haven't failed out of grad school yet. I'm stressed 110% of the time and am ready to have the degree in my hand but I am glad to feel like I'm moving toward something again.

4. I have great family and friends that I need to be more actively grateful for. I'm extremely lucky to have  my support system.

5. My Mad Fat Diary is back on and I couldn't be more happy/obsessed. Seriously, find it and watch it. I'm looking into a region free DVD player just so I can own the first season on DVD.

6. It's almost March (how?!) and although that has me freaking out about midterms and assignments and deadlines in life, it also means that Hilary will be here soon! I can't wait to take her around to different restaurants (Texas knows how to do food) and be lazy and watch YouTube videos, TV shows, Divergent and just do whatever. Texas doesn't hold a candle to Portland (I'm wondering if I need to warn her about the lack of trees) but I'm excited to see her and show her around!

Exhibit A in case for Texas Food: BABE'S!!!

7a. I only work for four hours tomorrow, and three of them will be with my book club and we'll be discussing Me Before You by Jojo Moyes. READ THIS BOOK. And have a box of Kleenex nearby when you do.

7b. I'll (hopefully) have time to work on some assignments before work tomorrow, which will help relieve some of the guilt I have right now. After work I'll be meeting with Gabi to write. I miss writing regularly. Every time I do write, it's like a physical limb grows back where a phantom limb was before.